NEW POST: New Beginnings

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, " “Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely for it is too dear with hopes and opportunities to waste a moment on the yesterdays.”

What Mr. Emerson said is so powerful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


One of my favorite lessons I have wrote was entitled, An Annual Review With You. At the end of the lesson, I included a poem entitled - Beginnings.

Beginnings

Endings are the seeds to beginnings. Tomorrow will come in time.
Even in hopelessness lies a seed of hope,
And even small seeds can climb.

But the little seed has to give up its past
On its voyage to the sprouting tree
Didn’t you ever transcend your life,
Previous visions of who you could be?

Every cloud opens up to the smiling sun,
And the low will soon reach high tide,
Exits and entrances are at the same gate.
Moving through is your ticket to pride.

And two triangles have to surrender themselves to ever become a square.
And every simple discovery in life makes you give up
What you thought was there

Caterpillars will butterfly off the ground. Give up your past to be king.
Horses run best when not looking back. Let go to reach higher things.

You have to give up your discomforts to ever soar in flight.
But isn’t the end of something that’s wrong
The beginning of something that’s right?

So, you stand at the spot where endings begin,
Handcuffed by the past or freed.
One path will take you to where you have been,
The other will set you free.

So pick yourself up like the rising sun, like the wind lifting the silent sea.
Plant a hope in your heart like a seedling in spring
And step forward to your new destiny.

In that spirit - here's a great set of questions to help you do a Mid Year Review With You - consider it a tune-up for excellence.


Introductory Questions:

1. How would you describe the season of life in which you are now? What are its major opportunities and challenges?

2. Looking back over your life, what have been the main chapters in your story so far?

3. Who are the most influential people and what are the defining events of your life?

4. What do you consider your foremost

-satisfactions and accomplishments?

-failures?

-regrets?

-uncompleted projects and dreams?


Actions: Plan a longer “time out” with sufficient opportunity for solitude, reflection, and appraisal.


Faith:

1. How would you identify yourself in terms of your core faith, view of life, moral standards, and believing community?

2. Would you describe your faith as a private part of your life or as decisive for the whole? Something which has stayed much the same or grown and matured with you over the years? Something purely formal or something as emotionally and intellectually deep as you are?

3. Who are the people and what are the resources through which your faith is regularly challenged to deepen and grow?


4. Do you make a practice of taking “time out to review your journey and reorient your life in light of your faith? What does this mean to you?


Action: Consider one single step that would most help to revitalize and deepen your faith.



Giftedness:

1. What do you consider the core of your God-given Talents?

2. How would you describe the moments in our childhood or in later years when you first realized the satisfaction of expressing your own unique gifts?

3. Do you feel your gifts are recognized and fruitfully employed – or neglected, even wasted – at home? At work? In your community? In your faith community?

4. What are the chief goals you would like to serve with your gifts?

Action: From your talents that have not so far come into play as much as others, consider which one you would like to emphasize at this stage of your life.



Relationships:

1. How would you describe the depth, intimacy and richness of your closest relationships – with your family, friends, neighbors, and colleagues?


2. Who are your heroes and mentors in life? What example, inspiration, and challenge do you gain from each? Who are those younger than you for whom you play a mentor/hero role?

3. What regular, practical form do close friends play in your life in terms of fellowship, encouragement, accountability?

4. If your family and friends were asked to describe you in five words, what would those words be? What do you think they would miss?


Action: Put down one thing (for example, an expression of gratitude of an apology) which would most improve one of your closest relationships


Work:

1. Describe how your daily work contributes to a sense of “personal mission” and “life task”. What are the satisfactions and what are the frustrations you experience in your daily activities?

2. What gifts are truly “you” are not brought into play in your job?


3. How much is your sense of identity, status and satisfaction derived from your position and salary? What would be the effect of losing all this tomorrow?

4. What do you see as your sense of calling that links your working life and your life outside work, including retirement, however fare in the future?

Action: Identify one initiative that could improve your work satisfaction, including a possible alternative career track.


Wider Community:


1. What part des the wider community (Neighborhood, city, nation, world) play
in your thinking?

2. Trace the story revealed to you by the ways you spend your time and money. Does this confirm or contradict what you say above?

3. Do you feel a sense of connection and involvement with your faith community and your neighborhood? Why or why not?

4. Describe the part played by your faith community in giving you a sense of the
times in which we live and helping you to participate in wider community affairs.

Action: Consider how you could take your entrepreneurial gifts and use them to contribute to some worthwhile community or nonprofit initiative.


Concluding Questions:

1. What would you say you have accomplished with your life so far?

2. Think back over the dreams, ambitions, and hopes of your youth. How does your present position in life measure up to these?

3. What are the main imbalances in your life that you would like to address?

4. What is the principal legacy you would like to pass on at the end of your life?



Action: Focus on one thing in your like that is missing, wrong, or confused, and decide what to do to improve it.

NEW POST: What I Want My Boys To Say About Me After I'm Gone

I was at the beach last night watching my boys surf. I was thinking about life's magical moments and this was certainly one of those. I was reminded about how important it is to be a parent with purpose. I have made alot of mistakes in my life and learned many lessons about effective parenting. Without question, one of the things that has made the biggest difference is asking my boys to hold me accountable. Weird? Think about it.

We all need accountability, coaching, friendly reminders from time to time, on how we are to live, and honoring comitments we have made. I feel healthy, excited and purposeful in life and yet the other day I went negative in front of my oldest son, Jon. He reminded me of my covenant - "he was a positive man and always looked on the bright side of things." Instantly, my heart and spirit got happy and I smiled. Jon said, "see dad, that wasn't hard".

Here's my point - whether it's a covenant you make with your spouse, kids or your customers, when you go on record saying you will be something or do something, and then share that with key people in your world, they will help you stay on track and stay the course.

Here's what I wrote down when I thought about the legacy my actions would leave for my boys - this is my covenant to them. And by the way, I did the same thing with Sheryl - still too raw to share- but I'm convinced it helped us finish strong and spend 25 years together before she lost her battle to cancer.

Enjoy:

1. He loved God with all of his heart

2. He loved mom and treated her with respect and kindness

3. He always spent time with us – he put us first during his moments at home

4. He was fun to be with and made us laugh

5. He taught us what manhood was all about

6. He prayed with us to ask God into our life

7. He taught us the importance of prayer and scriptures

8. He was a positive man who always looked on the bright side of things

9. He made a difference in our lives

10. We learned from him:

 Honesty
 Gratitude
 Attitude
 Love
 Discipline
 Completion
 Focus
 Honor
 Persistence
 To always be our best


Go ahead! Be bold! Make some promises that will lift you and those you love to a higher level.

NEW POST: Tough Times Never Last But Tough People Do

My son Matt was in a weird mood this morning. He seemed a bit overwhelmed. He's twelve. And while life is hard for him having lost him mom to last year to cancer, I couldn't understand his funk. I asked him, "what's up scoreboard?"(his sports nickname which always seems to bring him back) He said, "life feels hard dad". What a statement. So we continued to talk and I found out a bit of what was bugging him and then I said, "You know Matt, tough times never last but tough people do." Then he asked, "how do you be tough?"

As I contemplate my son Matt's situation and reflect on the highs and lows of my own life on and off the job, I forced the question – “How tough am I?” “How tough are you?” And, if tough times never last, then what are you doing to get through whatever tough times you are in. What am I doing?

Here were my thoughts:

Keep your eye on the goal line. Sometimes you have to look beyond the problem to stay inspired and to maintain your hope. There is always a way to get through a situation and I believe it is easier when you stay focused on the end result.

Do less, not more. Don’t overreact in tough times – it’s easy to do. I remember Bob Kriegel who wrote the book, “If it Ain’t Broken, Break It” saying, “A 90 percent passionate effort will always outperform a 110 percent panicked effort.” In the movie, A Bugs Life, the ant coach in the middle of a crisis said, “Relax, we only lost a few inches.” I attached that video file. It's an amazing clip on handling challenges.

When times are tough you have to do the fewest things possible that produce the greatest results. Maybe it’s prospecting the right business partners. Maybe it’s reconnecting with previous customers. Maybe it’s doing business presentations. Whatever your unique circumstance, you must do fewer, but the right high-impact activities.

Measure your progress. Achieving positive momentum is crucial during periods of difficulty. Whatever activities you choose to be involved in during the valleys of your business and your life, measure their impact. Measure them frequently. Measure them daily. Don’t let time go by without having a “reality” check with how the tasks are paying off.

Don’t beat yourself up. We all make mistakes. But tomorrow is a new day too dear with hopes and aspirations to waste a minute focusing on yesterday. Jonathan is my oldest son and yesterday he went 0-3 in his baseball game and missed a fly ball to center in the bottom of the 7th inning, tied 11-11. The other team won. As you can appreciate, he felt dejected. I looked him in the eye and said, “Jonathan, the very best players have good days and bad days. You’ve made great plays. You’ve pitched shut-outs. And you have hit home runs over the fence. You’re a great player and next game you can prove it.” He smiled and said “Thanks Dad.”

Tough Times Never Last but Tough People Do

NEW POST: Learning to Surf

Amazing....I told my friends I was learning to surf and asked for advice. Here's the top 10 list. Pretty funny I think.

Top 10 Pieces of Advice for Learning to Surf

1. Don’t fall
2. Protect your nipples
3. If you see a fin coming out of the water, paddle fast
4. Keep your mouth closed
5. Watch out for sharks
6. Advil
7. Make sure you are on water
8. Have fun
9. Pee in your wetsuit for warmth
10. Don’t act like an injured seal

NEW POST: When Real Class Shows Up

The doctor had his TV on in his office when the news of the military base shootings at Ft. Hood , TX came on. The husband of one of his employees was stationed there.

He called her into his office and as he told her what had happened, she got a text message from her husband saying, "I am okay." Her cell phone rang right after she read the message. It was an ER nurse," I'm the one who just sent you a text, not your husband. I thought it would be comforting but I was mistaken in doing so. I am sorry to tell you this, but your husband has been shot 4 times and he is in surgery."

The soldier's wife left Southern Clinic in Dothan , AL and drove all night to Ft.Hood. When she arrived, she found out her husband was out of surgery and would be OK.

She rushed to his room and found that he already had visitors there to comfort him. He was just waking up and found his wife and the visitors by his side. The nurse took this picture.

What? No news crews and cameras? This is how people with class respond and pay respect to those in uniform.

I sent my cousin in Fayetteville , N.C. (Retired from Special Forces) that picture of George W. visiting the wounded at Ft. Hood . I got this reply:

What is even better is the fact George W. Bush heard about Fort Hood, got in his car without any escort, apparently they did not have time to react, and drove to Fort Hood. He was stopped at the gate and the guard could not believe who he had just stopped. Bush only asks for directions to the hospital then drove on. The gate guard called that "The President is on Fort Hood and driving to the hospital."

The base went bananas looking for Obama. When they found it was Bush, they immediately offered escort. Bush simply told them it wasn't necessary; he just wanted to visit the wounded and the dependents of the dead.

He stayed at Fort Hood for over six hours, and was finally asked to leave by a message from the White House.

Obama flew in days later and held a "photo" session in a gym, and did not even go to the hospital.

All this I picked up from two soldiers here who happened to be at Fort Hood when it happened.

This Bush/Obama/Ft.Hood story is something that should be sent to every voter in the US . Those who wanted "change" certainly got it.

NOTE: This is a post and does not necessarily represent all my views, politically or otherwise - but this is how I would define class - Todd Duncan